(The picture above is my 2015 dream board)
Am I really putting this out there for all to see? Yikes! Well here goes nothing. At the beginning of each new year, I typically make a few of the same resolutions:
examples: I want to eat healthier, exercise more, be a better mom, friend and wife.
After a few weeks, life happens and then they somehow get washed along the wayside. I try to pick them back up after I go long stretches of indulging in whatever I want and so goes the cycle. Well I’m tired of repeating the same things over and over. I want to be an overcomer but quite honestly I’m just not sure how to do that completely.
This year, I started out with the same goals and many more. Myself, as well as several women I am in community with, decided to do a 21 day fast to bring in the new year. Each of us fasting for something different. Some have cut out sweets, shopping, Facebook, meats and more. We all share the same desire through our pursuit. Its for God to fill our hearts and minds with more of Him.
I spent some time in prayer during the first few days. I was asking for forgiveness for the way I have allowed things to control my life, specifically food. I asked for healing and for a new mindset when it comes what I put into my body. I want to know what God wants for to me to eat and what He wants to teach me about food in general.
I remember several years back when smoking had such a stronghold over my life. I had been a closet smoker for more than 10 years and in those years, I had quit probably 1000 times. It was also a vicious cycle and God finally helped me discover the path He had for me, which set me free from that addiction in my life. I’m not overweight and I don’t have an eating disorder but I am all over the place when it comes to how it controls me from day to day and quite frankly, I’m tired of that sad truth. Ironically, I have discovered that I hear some of the same lies that I once heard when it came to smoking.
You deserve it, you’ve been good all day today
Just one won’t hurt you
Its not that bad for you
You love it
I think one of the hardest things about it all is that I truly don’t even know what is healthy for me. Am I supposed to watch my Calories? Or should I focus on Trans fat? Where do you begin with educating yourself on the endless options out there for healthy living? What is God wanting to show me about all of this? I think everyone is different. God has been showing me in the last few weeks what to cut back on, what to educated myself on, when it’s okay to give in and how to view it all. As He does, I write it down and little by little, I feel empowered.